Even more chronicles...

Kendall: he is an ass and he wouldnt try that crap with robin
me: yea thats true
she is a badass
deceiving bc of her sweet name
like the bird i drew for you yesterday

On a woman who has had 2 job interviews since being unemployed:
me: how long has this lady been unemployed
Kendall: if I am thinking of the correct lady....a year
me: 2 effing interviews
Kendall: yeah i know
me: way to put the nose to the grindstone
Kendall: she doesnt sound like a total reject but she called out of the blue
me: well shit
if she cant get a job with 2 interviews a year im not sure what more i can do
Kendall: lol
me: slow down lady!

me: this guy reeks
does no one own a bar of soap in this town
Kendall: i dont know...you're from here...you tell me
j/k
me: i feel like i need to do one of those like.. outreach programs
you know
Kendall: i dont know if want to reach...out...toward some of these people
me: in 2nd grade my class had to help a family that lost a b unch of stuff in a fire or something.
and we all had to bring in diff stuff
i brought in fishing supplies
the necessities
teach a man to fish
you know

me: subject line from spam email i got today
"Were you drunk? Answer, bastard!"

On cheating boyfriends:
me: i have never put up w it
i have been cheated on one time
and i broke it off and bitch slapped him for good measure
that is a fond memory

me: this coffee is amazing
i want some more
like oliver twist